How to Prepare for Your San Diego Divorce
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The decision to divorce is only the first step in the process towards your new life. Once the divorce process starts, it is vital that you know not only what to expect from the divorce itself, but also that you have a clear understanding of the current state of your family affairs and know how to protect your legal rights. The secret to the best possible outcome in the divorce is preparation. You have to take action and prepare yourself legally and emotionally for whats to come.
Here are some tips to help you get ready and get through the divorce process:
Make a Plan and Keep Working It Step by Step. A lot of things in the divorce process are out of your control; try not to blow them out of proportion. Instead concentrate only on the things you can control and change. This way you will take control of your divorce and not let it take control of you. Make a To Do List. A to do list is the easiest way to stay organized and set your priorities during a divorce. List all the items you have to accomplish and mark them off as you go. Prepare a Divorce Notebook. A divorce produces a lot of paperwork and the simplest way to keep track of all these papers is with a three ring binder. Put everything in chronological order and make an index. You can also use tab dividers and organize all of the papers by their source, i.e. court pleadings, attorney letters, your documents, etc. Gather Financial Information. The more you can organize your own financial documents, the more you will reduce your attorney fees and improve your chance of success. Before separating, make copies of all pertinent financial documents. You should have a copy of tax returns, bank statements, bank accounts and numbers, retirement accounts, and any savings accounts. Also, have a copy of any mortgage documents and proof of any other properties you and your spouse hold jointly. Do Your Research. To make the best choices and decisions, it is valuable for you to learn everything you can about divorce early in the process. You can learn about divorce law by looking up your states statutes, checking your attorneys website or talking to friends who have been through divorce. However, although you can raise your comfort level and your odds of success by finding out what is going to happen before it happens, keep in mind that every divorce is different and what is true for one person may not necessarily work for another. Keep a Divorce Calendar. If you are currently using a desk calendar or day planner, you will now need to include your divorce events. There will be meetings with your lawyer and court deadlines to keep track of. It would also be worth your while to keep track of discussions with your spouse, visitation dates with children and appointments with your childrens teachers, doctors, coaches and tutors. This may become evidence of your participation in your childrens lives in your divorce. Cut Expenses. If you have debt in your name, like credit cards or student loans, you will want to pay those debts down as much as possible before a divorce. If your family is like most American families, you have been spending close to your entire income, if not more, and when one household becomes two, there will not be enough money to pay the expenses of both unless something changes. You may have to cut expense, sell the car and get a less expensive model, or maybe sell the house. If your spouse does not voluntarily support you and the children, your remedy is to ask the Court to order support. You will not have a good prediction of any of this and you will not know the answers for sure until the agreement is signed or the judge makes a ruling. But the point is to think about it, and identify problems and possible solutions. Then take the actions that you can take and avoid missteps. Stick to a Routine. It will help if you try to keep things as normal as possible in your life. Do not skip meals or change sleeping habits. Positive routines like using your to do list and calendar will help you keep focus. Exercise is always a great way to relief stress. Try not to isolate yourself from your friends. Be Constructive. Try to maintain a positive outlook and do not let yourself be lured into needless conflicts with your soon to be ex. You will still be parents together for years after the divorce. Take care of yourself and your children. Put yours and your childrens needs first. Keep the communication open and talk to your children about the divorce in a way that lets them know, that they are loved just the same as before and that you will be there for them no matter what. Also, children tend to take responsibility for the failure of the parents relationship. So watch for those signs and address their concerns as needed. Do not try to downplay the changes all of you are going through.
All in all preparation is the key to keeping your sanity during the divorce process. If you take it one day at the time and focus on the present instead of the past, you will come out of the process with few if any battle scars.
Call (619) 630 4765 today and schedule your consultation with an experienced divorce attorney at Womens Divorce Center.’